Alone at the Top of the Class
by Discordia the Goddess of Irony
Summary: Two years after the game ends, Quistis has to learn how to adjust to her life. This is part of a trilogy that I'm working on and focuses exclusively on Quistis. Rating for language more than anything.
1. Default Chapter

A/N: First of all, I do not own Final Fantasy or Squaresoft. Only the characters that I made up are my own. This story is designed to be part of an interlocking set. This part will be told from Quistis's point of view and is meant to support the central story. I'll try to keep it where one can be read without absolutely needing to read another, but it's best to get the whole picture. The other two parts of the set will focus on other characters: one on Seifer and one from Squall's point of view. The one focusing on Seifer will be in third person. That said, please read and review. 

  
  
  
  
  
  


I never imagined that I would get so far in life. After all, how much opportunity does an orphan get in this world? Things started roughly enough, in that little orphanage trying to fill in for Ellone. Then of course there was that awful foster home. It's hard to believe that those people were allowed to adopt me; they were so dreadfully ignorant and repressive. I suppose that was reason enough to forget, to put everything behind me, good and bad.

  


SeeD changed my life, even if I was only a child. I didn't have much talent for combat back then, but it was to be expected; I was so _young_. I think that first the year was one of the hardest, but once I acclimated myself to Garden and discovered the joys of learning, well, things got better. Looking back, I can remember and know that it wasn't GF that made me forget. I simply didn't _want_ to remember those first few years.

  


Learning was easy enough for me; I let it occupy me all the time. When I was studying, that was all there was. I didn't have to worry about a hundred little details concerning my sad life. It didn't take too long to become the model student at the head of the class. I entered SeeD as soon as possible. I had to keep learning, improving myself. I probably did it as much for my own benefit as to show those foster parents that I _could_ make something of myself.

  


I suppose that's what alienated me from my classmates. Everyone thought I was a cold know-it-all, a prude even. I grew up so much faster than everyone else around me, _too_ fast. I was too mature for my classmates and expected too much from them. That's why I couldn't share my feelings with anyone. I ended up bottling my emotions and trying to smile, even when I was unhappy.

  


Squall and Seifer really rattled my cage. It was like a whirlwind had descended on the Garden and left those two behind. If they had shown more interest in the girls, they would have reminded me of a pair of rams fighting. Seifer was always starting the fight, and I was always the one breaking them up. I guess I was trying to be the big sister. Honestly, it bothered me to see Seifer always picking on Squall to get attention or starting a fight over some trivial matter.

  


Puberty made all of that a living hell that infinitely surpassed the trials of the Fire Cavern. By that time, I had come to see a kindred spirit in Squall, someone with just as many problems in communication and expression. Besides, he was _attractive_. Whether he noticed or not, there were _plenty_ of girls that would have loved to date him. Hormones, I found, are the supreme enemy of a female trying to achieve everything before she's twenty. I already suffered from mild depression; the _last_ thing I needed was to have cramps, mood swings, and a crush on the most unreachable male in the Garden.

  


Becoming the youngest instructor at the age of seventeen only compounded my problems. If I was uncomfortable with people my age before, I was absolutely _dumbfounded_ about how to act after that. No one wanted to be friends with their _instructor_. The only people that sought my company were those fanatical 'Trepies.' The whole thing overwhelmed me.

  


My relationship with Squall was, at the most, a business association. I was his instructor. There was nothing more between us. I couldn't even call him a friend, since he only spoke to me when he was either pressured or required to do so. I could have stared at him doe-eyed and pouting, and he wouldn't have noticed. 

  


After I was relieved of my instructing duties, we finally became friends. Unfortunately, Rinoa had entered the picture by that time. Whatever chance I might have had disappeared the second she smiled at him and dragged him onto the dance floor. All I could do during that whole time was bury my emotions like always. As much as I hated myself for it later, when things happened to Rinoa or her life was in danger, I was sort of _glad_. That was only until I saw what it did to Squall. He had been enchanted by her. Seeing her in trouble only caused him undue emotional pain. Even _that_ upset me: that _Rinoa_ had simply fallen into his arms like a damsel in distress, and he had fallen I love with her. And who did that leave _me_, Irvine or Zell? Irvine was taken with Selphie, and she could _have_ him for all that it mattered to me. As for Zell, he was too crude, boorish, and loud. I had nothing against him personally and found him to be considerate on occasion. I simply couldn't have settled on him as a boyfriend.

  


Thankfully, I have been reinstated as an instructor and can once again bury myself in my duties. Squall, of course, became Headmaster so that Cid could retire. He and Edea plan to restore the old orphanage and settle down peacefully. Sorceresses and their Knights. Is that what it takes? Squall surprised everyone and proposed to Rinoa, and she surprised no one and accepted. She's been hinting that she wants to have _me _as _her _maid of honor. For that to happen, though, she'd actually need to agree on a date for the wedding. She's been putting it aside for two years now. I'm beginning to worry about Squall and the effect it might be having on him. Of course he is fully capable of handling his own affairs in regards to his private life. I still don't know if I really want to stay and deal with all of this. Perhaps I should just request a transfer to Trabia or Galbadia.

  


With everything that's happened in the past few years, I wish it _was_ GF that made me forget. Then it wouldn't take years for me to put all of this behind me. Then again, perhaps I'll never put this behind me Maybe I'll become a sour old maid who can't move forward in life, stuck wondering what might have been. Maybe my foster parents were right, and happiness just wasn't meant for me. Maybe there really _isn't_ anyone out there that could make me happy. Then again, perhaps I'm just being pessimistic. Perhaps.


	2. Chapter 2

A/N Sorry that I haven't updated this in a while, but if you've read my bio, you'll understand. First, I still don't own the rights to anything produced by Squaresoft, so no lawsuits please. Thanks to everyone that reviewed my last chapter, especially my beta reader and editor, Sagan Fox; I couldn't do this without you. I've never been terribly comfortable using first person narration exclusively, so I've decided to change the format of this story, along with "The Lion's Pride." Both will now have third person, limited narrators, with the private thoughts of the characters italicized. Anything that requires description that involves action is in third person, while thoughts remain in first person. It's more like the other part of this little trilogy, "The Fallen Knight's Tale." Well, that's enough from me. If you would, please read and review, and if you really want to, go read the other parts of this story. Enough shameless promotion of my work, here's a shameless promotion for the wonderful fics of my best friend Sagan Fox. *Shameless Promotion* 

  
  
  


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_It was quite a shock to see Leona again. She always seemed nice enough, but she also had her disciplinary problems. Of course, she and I always seemed to get along. She was never rude to me, although she fought with other students on several occasions during the short time I knew her. That whole incident with Seifer Almasy seems less than encouraging. Leona always tried to follow her own path, so she and Seifer will probably have as many problems as he and Squall did. I just don't feel like being the one caught in the middle of another quarrel. I'm so tired of being the one keeping everything under control, acting as the liaison between the students and the Headmaster, helping make all of the more important decisions. Squall doesn't really know how to handle his job, and it must seem so pointless to him. But that's his problem, not mine. Granted, no one ever distinguishes between where their problems end and mine begin. It always, "Quistis, what do you think I should do about this," or "Why doesn't so-and-so like me?" If I have to listen to this much longer, I'll go insane._

  


_ I suppose I don't have any right to complain. I took the job, and I have to abide by the rules. I have no personal life and am in charge of taking care of everyone else's lives. Great. I suppose I could talk to someone about this. I certainly can't speak to Squall about my problems, since he's part of them, the same with Rinoa. Rinoa wouldn't understand anyway. Selphie and Irvine might understand, but I don't really want to discuss this with them. There's always Zell; he's been a little less . . . over the top. Becoming an instructor did him a world of good, even if he's only a combat instructor. The only other person I could really talk to is Lea, but I doubt that she'd want to hear about all of my little problems. She probably has issues of her own to deal with. I just hope she and Seifer don't cause any more problems. Oh well, it's Squall's problem if they do._

  


_ Squall will probably approve the Esthar Garden, since he doesn't trust the Headmasters of either of the other Gardens._ _Not that I'd blame him. The Trabia leader is honest enough, but he doesn't have the backbone to oppose Galbadia. Galbadia still doesn't have a single, clear leader. They probably won't for another couple of years. In the meantime, Squall has to worry about the global opinion of the newest sorceress and the Gardens' ability to deal with her. Esthar would be a wonderful ally, as they have such technological advances. I only hope that they choose a member of the Garden to serve as Headmaster. I feel sorry for anyone they choose, but someone has to take control. I just wonder why Esthar wants this Garden. They can't possibly feel threatened with the army that they have. Maybe Laguna's just trying to patch up his 'relationship' with Squall. It's too bad that the two of them don't talk. I know it makes things difficult for Ellone, the poor dear. She just wants to have a family, like all of us. I suppose things will work out for the best, but I really don't know._

  


Quistis sighed and looked at the last words she had written on the page. It seemed like she was always hoping for a happy ending and never getting one. With a final glance at the journal lying on the desk in front of her, she stood up and prepared for another day. Squall owed Leona a decision within the next two days, and she had little doubt that he'd consult her about it. With a final glance in her mirror, Quistis moved to leave. 

  


"Well, I guess I should put that away," she muttered to herself, closing the journal and placing it in a locked drawer. "Why I keep that thing, I'm not sure." 

  


_'The truth of the matter is, I don't want to forget anything, whether or not the problem is GF related. Despite all the sadness and hardships I've experienced, they're still my memories, and I want to have them. Even if that means I have to keep a journal.'_

  


Quistis locked the door to her small apartment out of habit more than necessity. In addition to the students' dorms, the Garden offered living quarters for the faculty as well. She stopped in the Cafeteria for a cup of coffee and to chat with Selphie about the upcoming field test. 

  


"That won't be for a couple of months," Selphie murmured as she took another sip of her own coffee. 

  


"I know that, but the students have been asking when it will be. I just thought that you might have heard something from Squall. I'd just be happy to know what we're doing. After all, we do need to determine which instructors to send as support, and . . ."

  


"Quisty, please. It's too early. Don't worry about it. I'm sure if anyone finds out it will be you. Just focus on teaching them what they need to know."

  


"I suppose you're right," she conceded bashfully. "So, what do you think of the prospect of having a Garden in Esthar?"

  


Selphie glanced at Quistis over the top of her cup, raising an eyebrow. When she had finished, she continued staring at her friend. "Quistis, can you just stop thinking for like, five minutes maybe? Whatever happens will happen. Just don't worry about it. I guess it's fine if Esthar has a Garden; I don't see what the big deal is. Look. I have to go. I'll talk to you later."

  


The first class of the day was usually the worst, and it never helped that Seifer was in that class. Granted, he'd become less of a problem over the years, but Quistis still had trouble with him. To her complete surprise, Seifer was waiting patiently by the door of the classroom. It put her on edge. Seifer grinned at her surprise and inclined his head forward in a show of acknowledgment. He gestured to the locked classroom door.

  


"Good morning Instructor Trepe. You look surprised to see me."

  


"Class doesn't start for another ten minutes, Seifer. What are you doing here early?"

  


"I can't be early for class?"

  


Quistis arched her eyebrow dubiously but shrugged. She unlocked the door and turned on the lights before taking a seat at her desk. There were still several tests that she had to grade and a number of lesson plans and notes lying there, but she was oddly unconcerned by them. She looked up from her last minute preparations and found Seifer watching her.

  


"Why don't you study for the quiz today?"

  


"I already did," Seifer muttered quietly. "Besides, the information is the same since the last three times I took this class." He glanced at the instructor. "So, I guess the fourth time's the charm for me. Maybe this time I'll pass the field test."

  


"We'll see."

  


_'I wonder what's wrong with him. I've never seen Seifer Almasy willing to study before. He's changed, no doubt about it. I guess two years has finally beaten the insolence out of him.'_

  


Quistis occupied herself with class preparation, ignoring her erstwhile problem student. Seifer behaved, sitting quietly even as the other students filed into the room. The class went well, despite a few problems, and Quistis managed to keep the students under control. Shortly before the period ended, Leona walked in. She ignored the students, especially the ones that made no attempt to hide their curiosity.

  


"Quistis," she whispered, "Headmaster Leonhart would like to speak with you after class ends."

  


"What about my next class? I was going to give them a study hall anyway, but they need someone to keep an eye on them."

  


"I can do that. After all, what's my instructor's license for if not for babysitting teenagers?"

  


"All right," she conceded. "You don't have to tell Squall?"

  


"Hmm? No, I told him I'd watch your students for you. He probably wants to talk to you about Esthar anyway."

  


That was, in fact, what Squall wished to discuss. As Quistis took a seat, he paced the office floor. He turned to look at her, gesturing for her to give him a moment. From experience, Quistis had learned that Squall required several moments to collect his thoughts. He never had liked speaking with people, and he still didn't. When he finally took his seat behind the desk, Quistis waited for him to begin.

  


"Well," he began, "what do you think about the prospect of a new Garden?"

  


"I think we could use another stable ally. Galbadia still doesn't have a clear Headmaster, and Trabia can't compete with Galbadia in terms of strength. Esthar would have military and technologic capabilities. Besides, as long as Laguna is president, we'll have a sturdy ally. In the future, we'll just have to hope for a Headmaster willing to ally themselves with us."

  


Squall nodded thoughtfully before glancing inquiringly at her. "Do we have the funds to aid Esthar?"

  


"Of course. Balamb has received the most requests for SeeDs since Ultimecia's defeat, so we're in good economic standing. Granted, we can't build the Garden for them, but we can lend a helping hand. It will also fall to Balamb to provide qualified support staff. In the meantime, we should probably locate someone to serve as the Headmaster."

  


"Huh, what about Leona? Could she be a Headmaster?"

  


"With the proper training, yes she could. Leona's a very stable individual; she shouldn't have any trouble dealing with responsibility."

  


_'I just feel sorry for her if she has to bear such a burden. Twenty-year-olds shouldn't have to worry about the lives of several hundred people, especially as a Headmaster. Even Squall has problems, and I know it.'_

  


"Well, I'll make an official decision tomorrow. I think we'll be getting a sister Garden soon, though. Can you do me a favor? If you see Leona tomorrow, tell her I need to speak with her."

  


"Of course."

  


_'What else am I good for? I'm an errand girl after all, and a counselor and a decision maker and a friend but not . . . just forget it Quistis. That wound doesn't need to be opened again.'_

  


"I ought to head back to class."

  


"Sure. Oh, and thank you for your help."

  


Quistis nodded, a soft smile playing across her features. _'Deal with it; you're just his support group. You're responsible for helping him when he's incapable of doing something in his own.'_

  


~ ~ ~

Quistis stopped by the office before hunting down Leona the next day. As usual, the Headmaster seemed to be in one of his moods. Rinoa sat on the edge of his desk, watching as he paced back and forth but doing nothing to stop him. She narrowed her eyes slightly at Quistis but made no remark on the instructor's entrance. 

  


"Something I can help you with, Quistis?"

  


"Actually I needed a moment of the Headmaster's time. Is everything all right?" It took Quistis a moment to realize that Squall was in fact on the phone, having a rather heated discussion with the individual on the other line. "Should I come back later?"

  


Rinoa shook her head and indicated that Quistis should take a seat and wait. She did as she was asked, wondering how long Squall planned on yelling. When he finally turned his attention back to the rest of the office, he leveled his gaze at Quistis.

  


"Bring me Almasy," he directed with an increasingly common edge to his voice. "And Leona too," he added, realizing his obligation for the day.

  


"In any particular order?"

  


"I don't care. I have to deal with them both anyway. Surprise me."

  


"And shall I bring Seifer to you dead or alive?" she queried, hoping to lighten the mood.

  


"Whatever."

  


_'Lovely,' _she mused, _'he's reverted_ _to using that phrase as a response. I wonder what Seifer did this time.'_

  


Quistis left to search for the two Squall had requested. It took some time to locate them, but to Quistis' surprise they were both in the Quad. She took a moment to observe them before approaching, not realizing just how angry she appeared. At the sight of her, both Leona and Seifer paused. 

  


"Seifer, Lea, Squall would like to have a word with each of you."

  


Seifer predictably made light of the situation, grinning slightly as he commented, "But one word with one of us? Very well, make it a word and a blow."

  


Leona seemed to find the remark quite amusing, taking a notebook and pencil from Seifer as she responded. "Seifer, if I ask for you tomorrow will I find a grave man?" 

  


"Knowing Squall, you just might," he remarked with a wink.

  


Quistis waited for Seifer to leave before turning to Leona with her eyebrows raised. There was something about the way those two interacted that made her profoundly uncomfortable. She could feel the sisterly urge to meddle rising within her, but for a brief instant, she managed to control it. Once Seifer was gone, she turned on Leona.

  


"What was that all about?"

  


Leona smiled faintly before glancing at Quistis, "Oh, it's nothing. What does Squall want?"

  


Quistis shrugged. "I'm not certain, but since it's been close to a week, he probably wants to talk with you about Esthar. Then again, perhaps he wants to speak with you about the amount of time you've been spending with Seifer. There hasn't been a day this week that you haven't spoken with him. Are you sure that's wise?" She hadn't meant for the last comment to slip out, but it was unavoidable. She waited for Leona to respond snappishly but was pleasantly surprised when she merely sighed, rolling her eyes.

  


"Please, spare me the lecture Quistis. It's not your concern whether I speak with Seifer or not. He's harmless, and I enjoy talking with him. That's all."

  


_ 'Sure you are,' _Quistis thought as she arched an eyebrow and let her friend alone. _'I've known Seifer since he was a child, and he rarely just makes friends.'_ Quistis gestured toward the elevators, accompanying Leona and following her into the waiting room. Neither of them said anything, and Quistis merely observed her friend as she continued sketching the room around her. Quistis alternated between restless pacing and quiet observation, wondering what transgression Seifer had committed that would require such a long session in the Headmaster's office. Eventually, the door opened and Seifer stalked out of the room, looking as characteristically displeased as ever. _'I guess the meeting didn't go well,' _Quistis mused as she watched as Leona stood up and entered the office. And whether Leona was aware of it or not, Quistis noticed how her friend's eyes followed Seifer as he left. _'Oh Hyne, not now. The last thing I need to deal with is Seifer looking to get attention.' _

  


Rather than loiter in the Headmaster's office, Quistis went in search of her problem student. She would probably be briefed on the issue later, but she decided that it would be nice to have Seifer's side of the story first. It might save time when he and Squall got into a fight and demanded that everyone around them pick sides. _'The funny thing is everyone sides with Squall. I've yet to see anyone support Seifer. Fujin and Raijin are never around, and no one else is willing to stand up to Squall. Even me.'_

  


Quistis found her problem student in the Cafeteria, sulking in a corner while the rest of the students tried desperatelyto ignore him. She approached the table with some trepidation but ensured herself that it would be best if she spoke with him.

  


"Is this seat taken?"

  


Seifer barely looked up. "Knock yourself out. No one would want to sit with a loser like me anyway." 

  


Quistis bit her lower lip as she sat down, hoping that she could help the situation and not make it worse. In her experience, talking with Seifer was like trying to walk on thin ice; you never knew when you'd hit a thin spot. She glanced at him, trying not to look judgmental and failing miserably. After a moment of silence, she cleared her throat and began.

  


"So, what did Squall want this time?"

  


Seifer gazed at her with level and emotionless eyes. For several uncomfortable seconds, he merely regarded her, watching as she began to shift uncomfortably. Finally, he looked away and shrugged. "What's it to you? I'm sure Squall will give you the official version later. I don't see how my opinion makes any fucking difference whatsoever."

  


"Seifer, watch your language," Quistis responded cooly. "I want to hear what you have to say before I listen to another one of Squall's rants. Is that all right with you?"

  


Seifer raised his eyebrows slightly, obviously taken aback by Quistis' remark. Slowly, his facial expression softened. With a heavy sigh, he acquiesced. "Apparently Galbadia is less than pleased with the manner in which Balamb has dealt with me. They've been harassing Squall to expel me or take some other disciplinary action. And naturally, Squall takes it out on me. No big deal, right?" With a short, ironic laugh he began to get up. He stared down at Quistis for a moment. "Don't worry about me, _Instructor _Trepe. I'll be just fine."

  


Quistis remained at the table, unwilling to pursue the conversation any further. _'Of course you will be,'_ she mused, _'everyone always is. Regardless of anything that I do.'_ With a sigh, she too stood up. It would be best to see Squall immediately. That way she could just finish grading papers and fall asleep . . . alone, like always. _'Just once, I'd like to know what it's like to have someone hold me close. Why can't someone comfort me for a change?'_ Quistis shook her head. It did no good to mope and feel sorry for herself. With a slight reproach, she walked out of the Cafeteria, hoping that Squall would keep things brief. After years of dealing with everyone else's problems, she was finally getting tired of it. _'I need a vacation,'_ she thought bitterly.


End file.
